Hiya,
What did we learn at school? What are our kids learning at school?
Basically as far as I can determine, they are learning to ‘follow’
established lines of thought, ‘follow’ existing strategies and
formulas, ‘follow’ what the teacher says. They’re then marked on how
well they have followed.
I remember getting into heated arguments with my daughter whilst
trying to help her with Maths homework. She was learning a new way of
doing multiplication, division etc. and I only knew the way I had
learned. I showed her how to get the correct answer using my ‘old
school’ formula but she became upset and angry because she would be
marked down if she didn’t do it the new way.
Now, learning in these ways has it’s uses of course, BUT, it doesn’t
teach how to think. How to reason. How to invent. And that’s where we
were all let down and how our kids are still being let down.
I suggest that one of the most valuable skills you can nurture in your
children is resourcefulness. A good chunk of their adult life will be
dedicated to accumulating resources, yet resources in themselves have
no intrinsic value. If you lose them or use them they’re gone! But if
you are resourceful you can replenish them indefinitely. Being
resourceful is a key skill of the successful. If you want your
children to grow up to be successful, emotionally, financially,
socially and in any other way then they will need to be resourceful.
Start today, here’s a head start just to get your own resourceful gear engaged:
http://www.wikihow.com/Be-Resourceful
http://www.illuminatedmind.net/2010/07/13/how-be-resourceful/
http://www.ehow.com/how_2251619_be-resourceful.html
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
Saturday, 26 March 2011
Monday, 21 March 2011
Are Your Needs Being Met?
Since myself and my other half got our dogs we have been on a journey
of discovery. We’ve had to learn so much about dog care, nutrition,
socialisation and behaviour. What we’ve discovered is that dogs are a
lot more work than you might expect - and lot more costly too!
Our greatest challenge without doubt has been behaviour. Our younger
dog Bailey has issues with puppies and also, more alarmingly, with
children. Our older dog Annie seems to just have social issues with
greeting other dogs.
The most enlightening piece of advice we have been given recently is
that whatever the dogs unwanted behaviour the reasoning is always to
do with the dog’s needs not being met. This really got me thinking.
What was it that our dogs needed that made them behave in the way they
did? Well that’s the $64m question. For some behaviour it’s security,
other behaviour is due to a lack of social grace, other times it’s
resource guarding. The observation certainly isn’t the silver bullet
to our problems but it at least allows us to put our focus where it is
actually needed - the dog! Every time we have an issue we ask - ‘What
did our dog need in that situation?’
This got me thinking about human behaviour and if it could be
categorised in the same way. I think it can. Think of unruly children,
shouting, being rude, being anti-social or even violent. It’s easy to
judge them whether they are toddlers or teenagers by blaming the
parents or labelling them as scum.
But apply the thought above and ask what needs might they have that
aren’t being met.
Maybe their parents haven’t given them guidelines, parameters or been
good role models. Maybe the school system has let them down by not
motivating them - after all everyone’s different and just because you
are not excited by the education system as it stands shouldn’t mean
you’re automatically not worth teaching. Rudolph Steiner’s system
certainly has a better record for pupil engagement than the state
version.
This train of thought can then be applied to adults which act contrary
to our laws or values. Our prisons are full of people who didn’t
comply with the general populace’s view of a civil society. But, has
our society failed to meet their needs in some way? A large percentage
of inmates are illiterate which kind of suggests that at the education
stage we are letting down a lot of children to the degree that we are
breeding adults that have little opportunity to engage in our society
in the conventional way. They then feel excluded and a proportion turn
to crime.
So, the next time you find yourself quick to judge someone else, first
ask the question: ‘What needs might they have that aren’t being met?’
It will pose deeper questions about our so called ‘civil’ society.
The next time you find yourself feeling less than positive about your life
turn the question inward and ask 'What Needs Do I Have That Aren't Being Met?.
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
of discovery. We’ve had to learn so much about dog care, nutrition,
socialisation and behaviour. What we’ve discovered is that dogs are a
lot more work than you might expect - and lot more costly too!
Our greatest challenge without doubt has been behaviour. Our younger
dog Bailey has issues with puppies and also, more alarmingly, with
children. Our older dog Annie seems to just have social issues with
greeting other dogs.
The most enlightening piece of advice we have been given recently is
that whatever the dogs unwanted behaviour the reasoning is always to
do with the dog’s needs not being met. This really got me thinking.
What was it that our dogs needed that made them behave in the way they
did? Well that’s the $64m question. For some behaviour it’s security,
other behaviour is due to a lack of social grace, other times it’s
resource guarding. The observation certainly isn’t the silver bullet
to our problems but it at least allows us to put our focus where it is
actually needed - the dog! Every time we have an issue we ask - ‘What
did our dog need in that situation?’
This got me thinking about human behaviour and if it could be
categorised in the same way. I think it can. Think of unruly children,
shouting, being rude, being anti-social or even violent. It’s easy to
judge them whether they are toddlers or teenagers by blaming the
parents or labelling them as scum.
But apply the thought above and ask what needs might they have that
aren’t being met.
Maybe their parents haven’t given them guidelines, parameters or been
good role models. Maybe the school system has let them down by not
motivating them - after all everyone’s different and just because you
are not excited by the education system as it stands shouldn’t mean
you’re automatically not worth teaching. Rudolph Steiner’s system
certainly has a better record for pupil engagement than the state
version.
This train of thought can then be applied to adults which act contrary
to our laws or values. Our prisons are full of people who didn’t
comply with the general populace’s view of a civil society. But, has
our society failed to meet their needs in some way? A large percentage
of inmates are illiterate which kind of suggests that at the education
stage we are letting down a lot of children to the degree that we are
breeding adults that have little opportunity to engage in our society
in the conventional way. They then feel excluded and a proportion turn
to crime.
So, the next time you find yourself quick to judge someone else, first
ask the question: ‘What needs might they have that aren’t being met?’
It will pose deeper questions about our so called ‘civil’ society.
The next time you find yourself feeling less than positive about your life
turn the question inward and ask 'What Needs Do I Have That Aren't Being Met?.
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
Wednesday, 16 March 2011
What's most important? Running the race or winning the race?
Hiya,
Watch this moving video of Kelly Holmes winning her two Gold Medals then read the post underneath, I have an interesting question for you.
So, how do you think Kelly Holmes would answer the question in the title? If someone had said to her before each race 'Hey Kelly, you can have the Gold Medal, we know you're the best, there's no need to run' do you think she would have replied: 'Oh, great, thanks - I'll go get changed into my tracksuit then."
I don't think so.
The race is the challenge and the medal is the prize - the medal without the race means nothing. And I don't think it's about competing. I don't think it's about beating other people. I think it's about proving something to yourself.
So my question to you is: 'What prize are you after, and at what stage of the race are you in?'
If you haven't started yet that's ok - preparation is an important part of the process! If you don't do the prep you won't get past the first hurdle. Having said that, there's only so much prep you can do. You can't win the prize until you enter the race. Some of you I guess are already well in to the second or third laps, maybe you can even see the finishing line. Well done you! If you're struggling though and feel that you're not going to make it, dig deep, think of that podium, think of the roaring crowd, see yourself winning. This is your race and you can get that medal - but you have to keep going.
I hope you do.
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
Watch this moving video of Kelly Holmes winning her two Gold Medals then read the post underneath, I have an interesting question for you.
So, how do you think Kelly Holmes would answer the question in the title? If someone had said to her before each race 'Hey Kelly, you can have the Gold Medal, we know you're the best, there's no need to run' do you think she would have replied: 'Oh, great, thanks - I'll go get changed into my tracksuit then."
I don't think so.
The race is the challenge and the medal is the prize - the medal without the race means nothing. And I don't think it's about competing. I don't think it's about beating other people. I think it's about proving something to yourself.
So my question to you is: 'What prize are you after, and at what stage of the race are you in?'
If you haven't started yet that's ok - preparation is an important part of the process! If you don't do the prep you won't get past the first hurdle. Having said that, there's only so much prep you can do. You can't win the prize until you enter the race. Some of you I guess are already well in to the second or third laps, maybe you can even see the finishing line. Well done you! If you're struggling though and feel that you're not going to make it, dig deep, think of that podium, think of the roaring crowd, see yourself winning. This is your race and you can get that medal - but you have to keep going.
I hope you do.
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
Tuesday, 8 March 2011
When was the last time you wrote a 'real' letter?
Hiya,
When was the last time you received a letter from someone? I mean a
real letter, handwritten, on paper! Think about it. Do you remember?
For the purposes of today’s guide I suggest you remember a nice
letter. Now try and remember how it made you feel to open that
envelope and find that letter. It’s a great feeling isn’t it? In the
rush of today’s hectic schedules we have resorted mostly to
communicating via the internet - Facebook, Twitter, Email etc. and
that’s fine. It’s fun and functional and can be done instantly. But
it’s not the same as receiving a letter.
Make someone’s day tomorrow and write them a letter today. It’s a much
more robust way of saying I care about you and I’m thinking about you
- if for no other reason than it took more time and effort to actually
do.
Go get some paper and a pen. You’ll enjoy it too and maybe this will
become a frequent part of your life. I bet you the person you send a
letter to will send a reply the same way - then you’ll be the one
enjoying opening and reading a letter.
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
When was the last time you received a letter from someone? I mean a
real letter, handwritten, on paper! Think about it. Do you remember?
For the purposes of today’s guide I suggest you remember a nice
letter. Now try and remember how it made you feel to open that
envelope and find that letter. It’s a great feeling isn’t it? In the
rush of today’s hectic schedules we have resorted mostly to
communicating via the internet - Facebook, Twitter, Email etc. and
that’s fine. It’s fun and functional and can be done instantly. But
it’s not the same as receiving a letter.
Make someone’s day tomorrow and write them a letter today. It’s a much
more robust way of saying I care about you and I’m thinking about you
- if for no other reason than it took more time and effort to actually
do.
Go get some paper and a pen. You’ll enjoy it too and maybe this will
become a frequent part of your life. I bet you the person you send a
letter to will send a reply the same way - then you’ll be the one
enjoying opening and reading a letter.
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
Friday, 4 March 2011
How to LIVE
Hiya,
Watch this amazing video below then read the blog underneath - I have a question for you...
Amazing huh!
How many of the people in the video above are just lucky to be alive?
Quite a few.
Do you think that some of them went home that night and thought 'Wow! I'm lucky to be alive.
I've got a chance to start over. I should be dead right now. But I've got another chance.'
Now imagine it was you in one of those situations. Imagine that you weren't so lucky. Imagine that actually you were killed - I know, I know, it's a morbid thought but stay with me for a minute.
You die and float upwards looking at the scene of your death. After a moment of shock an arm slips around your shoulder, an angel is beside you and says:
'Would you like another chance?'
'Yes I would.' You reply. 'Can you do that for me?'
'I can on one condition.' The angel answers.
'Anything, what is it?'
'You have to ask yourself what it is you want to go back for - what do you want from your life?'
Of course at this point you'll probably think about just seeing your loved ones again etc. But the angel can read your mind and says:
'No, I want to know what you want to DO with your life, who you want to BE - why should you get a second chance?'
At this point you might review all those dreams and goals you had when you were younger, you might realise that you're not achieving them, you're not being the person you dreamed you would be. Then you may be able to convince the angel that if you had another chance you'd go for it, you'd stop worrying about this or that and you'd just go for it. No more mediocre, no more standing on the sidelines watching others fulfill their potential. You'd realise there was nothing to lose because right now you were dead and couldn't do anything at all. With a second chance at life you may as well just live your dream or die having tried your hardest.
So here's the question:
Why wait? Why wait to have a second chance?
Why not live the life of your dreams right now - today and every day. Tomorrow could be your last.
What would you say to the angel in order to get a second chance?
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
Watch this amazing video below then read the blog underneath - I have a question for you...
Amazing huh!
How many of the people in the video above are just lucky to be alive?
Quite a few.
Do you think that some of them went home that night and thought 'Wow! I'm lucky to be alive.
I've got a chance to start over. I should be dead right now. But I've got another chance.'
Now imagine it was you in one of those situations. Imagine that you weren't so lucky. Imagine that actually you were killed - I know, I know, it's a morbid thought but stay with me for a minute.
You die and float upwards looking at the scene of your death. After a moment of shock an arm slips around your shoulder, an angel is beside you and says:
'Would you like another chance?'
'Yes I would.' You reply. 'Can you do that for me?'
'I can on one condition.' The angel answers.
'Anything, what is it?'
'You have to ask yourself what it is you want to go back for - what do you want from your life?'
Of course at this point you'll probably think about just seeing your loved ones again etc. But the angel can read your mind and says:
'No, I want to know what you want to DO with your life, who you want to BE - why should you get a second chance?'
At this point you might review all those dreams and goals you had when you were younger, you might realise that you're not achieving them, you're not being the person you dreamed you would be. Then you may be able to convince the angel that if you had another chance you'd go for it, you'd stop worrying about this or that and you'd just go for it. No more mediocre, no more standing on the sidelines watching others fulfill their potential. You'd realise there was nothing to lose because right now you were dead and couldn't do anything at all. With a second chance at life you may as well just live your dream or die having tried your hardest.
So here's the question:
Why wait? Why wait to have a second chance?
Why not live the life of your dreams right now - today and every day. Tomorrow could be your last.
What would you say to the angel in order to get a second chance?
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
Thursday, 10 February 2011
The Power of Thanks
Hiya,
This is the simplest thing in the world to do - and sometimes the hardest.
We all have occasions where saying thanks to someone really sticks in our side. Sometimes we might even decide not to say it at all. But saying thanks under those conditions can really make a difference, not only to the person you’re saying it too but to you too.
When you can say thanks, and mean it sincerely, you are on the path to building a bridge with that person. That relationship could end up growing stronger or at least more bearable.
On the easy side - saying thanks to someone who has just held the door open for you or moved aside to let you through can brighten their day. That thanks will wind its way through the day passing from one person to the next and the next.
Be the one that starts that process off and then enjoy the thought of where it might end up. You never know, your easy thanks in the morning could end up being someone else’s difficult thanks at the end of the day.
Nice thought huh?
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
This is the simplest thing in the world to do - and sometimes the hardest.
We all have occasions where saying thanks to someone really sticks in our side. Sometimes we might even decide not to say it at all. But saying thanks under those conditions can really make a difference, not only to the person you’re saying it too but to you too.
When you can say thanks, and mean it sincerely, you are on the path to building a bridge with that person. That relationship could end up growing stronger or at least more bearable.
On the easy side - saying thanks to someone who has just held the door open for you or moved aside to let you through can brighten their day. That thanks will wind its way through the day passing from one person to the next and the next.
Be the one that starts that process off and then enjoy the thought of where it might end up. You never know, your easy thanks in the morning could end up being someone else’s difficult thanks at the end of the day.
Nice thought huh?
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
Saturday, 5 February 2011
Secret? What Secret?
Hiya,
You'd have to have been living in a cave for the last few years not to have heard of the phenomenon that is 'The Secret'.
But here's the thing - there is NO secret!
That's right, there is NO secret. What I mean by that is that if your life needs improving in any way - financially, emotionally, spiritually etc. then all the information you could ever want to help you improve your circumstances is out there ready and waiting.
What you have to do is LOOK!
If you've seen The Secret or read it you will have noticed that a lot of the cast mention reading certain books; Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill for example. These aren't hidden tomes stored away in secret libraries reserved for the intiated. They're out there in the market place waiting for open minds to give them a chance.
And if you're one of the few that have spent a lot of time looking for the answer but haven't found it yet, don't despair, keep looking. There is no failure per se. Only ways of finding something that doesn't work on your way to finding something that does.
Every successful person on the planet has failed on their journey, the difference between them and most people is they didn't give up.
“If you want to increase your success rate, double your failure rate.”
– Thomas Watson, Sr. Founder of IBM
With the internet providing us with instant search results it's even easier these days to find the information that will help you.
Do some searches on these for a start, they might help you along: Anthony Robbins, Bob Proctor, Oprah, Zig Ziglar, Brian Tracy, Neale Donald Walsch, Michael Beckwith, Finer Minds, RSA.
See where they lead you and before you know it you'll find more information that will help you than you can imagine.
And remember there is NO secret - looking and searching is the answer.
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
You'd have to have been living in a cave for the last few years not to have heard of the phenomenon that is 'The Secret'.
But here's the thing - there is NO secret!
That's right, there is NO secret. What I mean by that is that if your life needs improving in any way - financially, emotionally, spiritually etc. then all the information you could ever want to help you improve your circumstances is out there ready and waiting.
What you have to do is LOOK!
If you've seen The Secret or read it you will have noticed that a lot of the cast mention reading certain books; Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill for example. These aren't hidden tomes stored away in secret libraries reserved for the intiated. They're out there in the market place waiting for open minds to give them a chance.
And if you're one of the few that have spent a lot of time looking for the answer but haven't found it yet, don't despair, keep looking. There is no failure per se. Only ways of finding something that doesn't work on your way to finding something that does.
Every successful person on the planet has failed on their journey, the difference between them and most people is they didn't give up.
“If you want to increase your success rate, double your failure rate.”
– Thomas Watson, Sr. Founder of IBM
With the internet providing us with instant search results it's even easier these days to find the information that will help you.
Do some searches on these for a start, they might help you along: Anthony Robbins, Bob Proctor, Oprah, Zig Ziglar, Brian Tracy, Neale Donald Walsch, Michael Beckwith, Finer Minds, RSA.
See where they lead you and before you know it you'll find more information that will help you than you can imagine.
And remember there is NO secret - looking and searching is the answer.
for now
Be Inspired
Stu
If you like this you'll probably like my other blog:
http://thechangeyourlifeblog.wordpress.com
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